Any-maze #busy
Such experiences leave more than physical scars. It’s not something anyone can ever understand, unless they’ve been through it themselves. I couldn’t even lift a finger without excruciating pain. This fear developed after I lost total control of my body, and faced my first life or death situation at 17. In fact, what can be controlled, I control. I ‘cope’ by controlling many aspects of my life. But you’ve now hit a wall that you can’t breach.” The first time I saw a psychiatrist, she said to me, “You have some great coping mechanisms, or you wouldn’t have been able to do so well without psych meds for more than 10 years. Speaking of evaluating…I have a huge issue with control. I need to evaluate which practices are worth keeping – either because I enjoy them or because they’re beneficial – and which are time wasters that don’t add much value all round. I often feel like I’m drowning because I want to do it all, and am aware of the sore need to slow down for my own wellbeing. I’m not abandoning my blog, but I think I need to cut back on some of the related activities. Going for a stroll, working on my e-book, cooking a new recipe, or beautifying my work and home spaces are all just as important. I’m not saying that I’ll be scaling back on quality, but I need to get my priorities straight. I hope that I will be able to stop micromanaging so many things on my blog, just because I can, and because I want it to be ‘perfect’. Even a few days of change can be helpful in getting out of my stale headspace, and gain some fresh perspective. This is not a good thing, hence why I wanted to tag along on a trip to Taiwan with my partner. I suppose I’ve become too comfortable with my current daily blog routine, that I get uncomfortable if I veer too far from it. I can’t put new projects on my plate without first removing something, in order to make space for it (paraphrased from another blogger!). It’s only then that I can move on to ‘hopeful passive income item number two’. I’ll share more details when I get closer to completion, but it’s been sitting at chapter two for too long ? I’d like to make a conscious effort to speed things up a little. It will be an adaptation from my blog, but not a direct copy and paste, of course. While I have a few scattered projects on hand, the first one I’d like to finish is my e-book for sale. Writing on my blog alone will not suffice, and isn’t the best way to gain income, at least for me for now. I am aware for the need to diversify my income streams. But it would also be nice to actually earn enough to feed myself and buy my own medications, without relying on my partner or family. I sincerely strive to share knowledge of my personal experiences, and to provide support. One of the reasons why I’m investing so much time and effort into my blog, is that I hope to earn a relatively stable income from it some day. Besides, it will be a good opportunity to find joy in the little everyday things, and to pay more attention to my mind and body before there is even a need for relief. Sometimes, I need to think about long-term benefits over short-term gains.
#Any maze #busy series
I think the ‘boring self-care’ series sums this concept up pretty well. Perhaps these things bring a smile or relief for a little while, but my finances need some looking after as well, especially since I’m not working full-time. I tend to spend more money when I’m feeling down, and recently that’s been happening too often. I will only permit myself to buy basic necessities and refills of regular items. So here it is inked online – I’m going to try doing it for real (again ? ). I told myself that I was going to do a no spend month…for the past three months.
One of my flaws is that I’m impulsive, and terrible with money management.
But what I’d like to budget for October are my personal finances, the good old fashioned meaning of the word. As a person with chronic illness, rationing everything in your life is probably the norm rather than the exception. You could budget your energy or your time. CLICK HERE to submit your own entry, and to read about what others are up to as well! Budgeting